Your Dead End Can Lead to a Breakthrough
Jesus the Christ; the Master of building through failures, weaknesses, the impossible—through you.
Hello!!! It has been a while since I’ve published here and for a good reason. If you haven’t noticed—I’ve created, polished, and added to the branding I’ve been trying to convey. For more details you can visit my about page!
You know, when I finished updating and upgrading this space I felt so excited! But I also felt like I needed to reconnect with my truth. The truth of how all of this came to be, because it definitely did not start with just myself.
I took yet another break. I felt like I’ve been focusing too much on stats, gaining more followers/subscribers, and the “money” that comes from every online hustle the media seems to smother on my face. And of course, that stressed me out, I felt burnt out, and paused.
There are other struggle-bus things in my life that are making it more difficult than it should be because of my depression and anxiety. When I lost my focus of the bigger picture my writing-desire the Lord has given me, I started to dread showing up to this space. I started to almost hate writing because of all the unconscious expectations from the world (especially myself) and that was a great weight on my shoulders.
As much as helping to provide for my family sounds wonderful, I did not want that to be my ultimate drive to show up for this space. And funny enough, my body gave me that wisdom when I started to feel at risk of losing the magic I felt from my art. Even now, I honestly feel weird being trapped by this hustle-mindset that never served me (and truthfully, I’ve experienced this multiple times).
The Lord reminded me to not fear and that writing and sharing from my heart can bless my life (and others) with treasures He has prepared for me and my family.
I want to share something important with you. I won’t go into details at the moment…because lol.
Okay so, over the course of several months, the Lord prompted me to do something very much out of my comfort zone, I followed it, and it led me to feel too much stress, depression, and panic attacks. I thought that if I quit then it meant that I was not being faithful to the Lord. But sometimes, God gives us promptings to have us experience the wisdom we need. My “…hesitation to a good thing that God offered to me does not equal to my lack of faith, but wisdom to a breakthrough He was trying to open my eyes to…” (Janelle Lauren, Dear Creative Christian Podcast, 2023). And thankfully, I witnessed it. (This eye-opening thing came to me from a podcast I shared below!! Check out her stuff!!)
Sometimes, God allows us to experience dead ends to prepare us in humility for seeing the blessing of a unique work only YOU and I can do. To prepare myself to accept His grace. There is no shame in that.
God is not disappointed in you. He is working on you. He is building you. Which is why many things feel uncomfortable and heartbreaking, only for a moment.
God is confident in you, even if you are not. He is not a God of shame or contention. He is our Father who wants us to feel the love that comes from living under His promises. Under a big tree during spring time. I invite you to look for Him this week.
All my love,
to you and our new season of Oak & Bower. 🌿 ✨
My inspiration from the past month—
I finished an anime called, “A Sign of Affection,” HAHA it’s so good. If you know it, let’s scream together. 💗
Tuck Everlasting, the movie. Oh my gosh. My first time seeing it, but of course the book was better. BUT, I do love the aesthetic and music that the movie portrayed; very, very beautiful and enchanting.
The classic, old Barbie. This playlist never fails to bring me back to my authentic creative self, lol.